The Popcorn Lesson: Why Belonging Matters

September 13th – A gentle note: From popcorn to belonging — the same simple joy. 

A small ritual, a big meaning

Last night we had a movie night with popcorn. My boy got his few pieces — no salt, just a little taste.  And when the bowl was empty, he still walked to the kitchen to check. Just to make sure there really wasn't more. 🥹🩷

Side note: Always make sure the treats you share are safe for dogs, not everything we enjoy is suitable for them 

At first glance, it looks like begging. Like greed. But it isn't. Because it's not really about the popcorn.

It's about the pack

For dogs, food is a social ritual. Sharing a bite is a way of saying "I'm part of the pack." It's not the size of the treat that matters, but the meaning behind it. A tiny piece is enough when it carries the message: you belong here, you are included, you are loved.

And aren't we humans the same?
We don't just crave the food itself. We crave the moment of sharing, the laughter around the table, the quiet comfort of knowing we are welcome. We crave the proof that we are not outside, but inside. That we are part of something.

Even as an introvert, someone who genuinely enjoys solitude, I feel that deep need to belong. I can spend long stretches of time happily on my own, and yet, the warmth of a community still matters. At work, even if I don't always love the tasks themselves, it's my colleagues and the small connections that carry me through the day. In the future, I hope to work on my own terms, but I know I will miss the quiet gift of a work community: the unspoken support, the shared humor, the feeling of we're in this together.

Why belonging matters so deeply

Belonging is more than a nice feeling — it is a basic need. Without it, we wither. With it, we thrive.

Psychologists like Abraham Maslow have long placed belonging close to the foundation of human needs, right after food and safety. Modern research confirms it: connection reduces stress, supports the immune system, and even increases life expectancy. Studies show that people who feel they belong are not only happier, but also more resilient in the face of challenges.

Belonging gives us roots when life feels shaky, and wings when we doubt ourselves. It is the quiet medicine that holds us together.

The quiet signs of love

Sometimes the smallest bite is enough.
A word of kindness. A seat saved at the table. A text that says, "thinking of you."

Because belonging doesn't live in grand gestures. It lives in the little signs we give each other: you matter, you're here, you're part of this love.

Reflection for you: What small gestures make you feel like you belong? 🩷

And if this resonated with you, I'd love to continue the conversation together. Follow along on Instagram @selflavie for more soft reflections, daily notes, and gentle reminders. 

Soft hugs,
Selflavie